by It all started with a misstep.
One wrong step, one ill-timed twist of the ankle, and suddenly the confidence I’ve built in my body to achieve my goals feels vulnerable.
It’s not a serious injury and I was able to do a few decent sessions, but the end of year parkrun certainly served as a wake-up call, a reminder of how quickly everything I’ve worked for could unravel.
The Barcelona Marathon will take place on March 16, which suddenly feels like tomorrow. This is the time in training where “long runs” start to feel really long.
Add to that the winter weather, and it’s like the universe is challenging me to see how much I want this.
You’d think I’d be used to these mind games by now – Barcelona would be my eighth official marathon – but it’s as if every icy gust of wind and icy path seems to whisper, “are you sure you should do this ? And honestly, my brain often agrees. He tries to protect me, which I appreciate – sort of. But he also has a knack for blowing things out of proportion.
A little pain? Clearly, it’s the end of the world. A skipped race? I might as well hang up my shoes now. It’s like having a terrible roommate living in my head…and I need him to calm down.
But I know I really want this. I want to be on the starting line in Barcelona. I have already dedicated time, energy and a significant portion of my travel budget to completing this marathon.
The thought of not being able to run is overwhelming enough, but I also realize that I can’t wrap myself in bubble wrap and hope for the best. Trusting my body, as scary as it may be, is the only way forward.
Of course, trusting your body doesn’t happen overnight. It’s more like a relationship: you have to maintain it, listen to it and sometimes bribe it with pizza.
I have to try to make intelligent decisions between – if I can have more good than bad, then I have a pretty good chance.
How to find this balance? Here are some of the things I keep in mind while pursuing Barcelona.
1. Listen without overreacting
There’s a fine line between recognizing your body’s signals and catastrophizing every pain. I’m still learning how to connect without panicking. Is this pain just a sign of hard work, or is it something more? As a result, am I just tired and more worried?
2. Adjust my goals
I would love to go to Barcelona and set a new personal best. But really, it’s more about getting there, running hard and enjoying the journey. If that means replacing a tempo run with an easier effort or shortening a long run, that’s OK. My training plan is not set in stone; it is a guide, not a mandate. The block will be the block and I will have to adjust my goals depending on the training I can do.
3. Cross-training for confidence
When running seems intimidating, cross training proves to be a saving grace. I really learned to love strength training almost as much as running. Unfortunately, it doesn’t have the same community around it as running. But it’s a great way to stay in shape while giving my ankle and mind a bit of a break.
4. Lean on my support system
Talking with other runners was invaluable. Hearing how others have overcome similar fears and setbacks reminds me that I am not alone in this situation. This has been one of the many positives of joining Wymondham AC and I have no doubt it is similar at other clubs. The more I talk to runners, the more I realize that most are watching something.
5. Reframe my mindset
Instead of dwelling on what could go wrong, I strive to celebrate the small victories. Every run I do, no matter how slow or short, is one step closer to Barcelona. And every exchanged run, when done with recovery first, is an act of self-care, not a failure.
As winter’s grip tightens, I am reminded that the cold is temporary. March 16 will arrive whether I let my fears take over or choose to embrace the process. It’s a privilege to train for something like this, and I have to believe that my body is capable of it.
Yes, the marathon is fast approaching, and yes, long runs are intimidating. But I’m learning that preparation is about more than mileage. It’s about building physical, mental and emotional resilience.
And when I finally leave for Barcelona, I will take these lessons with me.
Don’t let me do too many parkruns in the meantime.
